Tuesday, November 22, 2005
"What is it about this dumb age?"
"Growing up is hard to do. They say that the two worst times in a woman's life are when she is thirteen and when her daughter is thirteen. I thought turning thirteen was just one step in growing up, but so far it's a lot of little steps, tripping me with challenges all the time.
"What is it about this dumb age that makes me cry all the time? I cry about friends I don't have, friends I do have, the way I dress, the way I think I look, the way I feel when somebody makes fun of me. The things that bother me the most are my height and my shape. I'm 5'8" and under 120 pounds. Many people may look at this as an advantage; I look at it as a tragedy. I'm constantly feeling like I stand out a lot. My arms seem too long, and my feet feel too big, and I just can't figure out how to use them properly....
"Another part about being thirteen is supposed to be growing. People talk about growing like it's a good thing. They even go as far as to call it blossoming. I don't call it blossoming; I call it shrinking. Shrinking into somebody who wishes she could go someplace and hide until she's the perfect shape and size."
Have you ever felt this way? What helped you to feel better about yourself? Several girls had good advice for Mary, including 11-year-old Gretchen from Iowa. Her response was published in the March/April 1994 issue.
"Do not be ashamed of your figure. ...Stand up and be proud! I would do anything to be 5'8" and weigh 120 pounds. You're practically modeling material! The people who make fun of you are probably jealous of you! I'm sort of fast in the 'blossoming' stage. Last year, most of the boys made fun of me and said I was fat. I took this seriously and went on a water and salad diet for about 2 weeks. I felt terrible for those weeks--and I didn't even lose any weight. Something that will help you is to try to find a friend who you can really trust. Someone who will tell nobody what you're telling her/him. I tried this and it really helps!"
